Healing from Rosacea was a challenge, a battle between my mind and my heart. My face taught me how to be attentive to all my needs.
To know and understand how to live and love as me and to understand the difference when I am was not living as me. Wrong company, wrong place, wrong time, wrong decisions—living from my conditioning, my past, my not myself.
The past impacts us on all levels. Freeing ourselves and making sense of it. The hurt, the pain. The cruelness is so hard to carry, and left in us, in our mind cycles, will steal us and has a huge impact on how we live and interact and bypass from loving and knowing ourselves whole.
Living with my face was so much harder; it took all I had. The lies to myself, my disrespect, living under my mind control. Wrong actions. I was a dark, confusing existence.
One of my pinnacle moments was when I became pregnant. I promised myself I would never raise my child or have a relationship with my child as I felt and had with my mother. There was no way I was dragging trauma through my lineage. It stopped with me.
That day sent me on a journey of self-discovery and de-conditioning myself from anything and everything that didn't feel me or Who was I, or who am I? I loved getting to know my truth and inner knowing, the shedding of all that was me, and the understanding of me. It did challenge me in many ways, as I "thought" I was living as me, but what came from getting to know me changed my life forever.
I was suppressing myself. Avoiding all sorts of pain.
It taught me how to hold myself, become responsible and accountable for myself, forgive myself for avoiding myself for so long. Embracing my essential self, connecting me deep with my strength and power to reveal and live as who I am.
Healing from Rosacea was a challenge, a battle with my mind and my heart. My face taught me how to be attentive to all my needs. To know and understand when I am not living as me. Wrong company, wrong place, wrong time, wrong decision—living from my conditioning, my past, not myself.
My past impacted me on all levels. Freeing myself and making sense of Me. The hurt, the pain. The cruelness was hard to carry, and left inside, it will steal us from loving and knowing ourselves.
Living with my face was so much harder; it took all I had. The lies to myself, my disrespect, living under my mind control. Wrong actions. It felt like a constant battle an existence.
My pinnacle moment came when I became pregnant, I promised myself I would never raise my child or have a relationship with my child as I felt and had with my mother. There was no way I was dragging ancestral trauma through my lineage. It stopped with me.
That day sent me on a journey of self-discovery and de-conditioning myself from anything and everything that didn't feel Who was I, and who am I? I knew I couldn't live as me carrying my pain, It blocked me and crushed me. Getting to know my truth my inner knowing, the shedding of all I was not, and understanding of me still continues today. Life never stops throwing shit at you but what I have now is tools and a great understanding or self to navigate my way through. It did challenge me in many ways, as I "thought" I was living as me, but what came from getting to know me changed my life forever.
I was suppressing myself. Who I was. Blocking myself from my own light and magic. The very parts of me that healed me. Rosacea taught me that I was the Dis-Ease. It taught me how to hold myself accountable, become responsible for myself, understand and embrace my essential self, and be brave enough to reveal and live as who I AM.
Authenticity is my reason for breathing and the discovery on a daily basis of who I am NOT.
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